The Anatomy of Peace by the Arbinger Institute.
Do:
Apply:
We often carry around hurt or pain from our past. We may think that these things don't bother us anymore. But unless we have made peace with them -- have expressed the feelings, got them all out, forgave and moved on -- we carry them around with us. The old negative feelings continue to hold us back and taint the relationships that we build in the future. These feeling continually keep us with a "heart at war" towards others.
Think of the people in your immediate family - parents and sibling (mentors, you can include your children in this). Which family member do you have a "heart at war" with? (Having a "heart at war" with someone doesn't mean that you hate them. It looks more like someone who bugs you or who you are easily drawn into contention with. We all have these feelings, so don't feel bad, we can fix it!) Choose the person you feel your heart is most at war with and write, beginning your writing with "My heart is at war with _(name)__ because...". Don't worry if you don't know what you are going to write. Once you start a paper with that sentence, it will come to you. Write everything that comes to your mind, don't edit things out (even if it's yucky). Get it all out. End your writings with "please forgive me for feeling this way and holding onto these negative feelings."
Now that you have written this paper, it is very important that you do the following: DO NOT SHOW IT TO ANYONE, DO NOT SHOW IT TO THE PERSON YOU WROTE ABOUT, and DO NOT KEEP IT AND REREAD IT. Take your paper and either shred it into little pieces and throw it away or even better, take it outside to your BBQ grill and burn it. (Please get your parent's permission before using fire, and DON'T BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!)
This pulls the negative feelings out of your heart and mind and is the beginning of healing your heart and your relationship with this family member. Do this as many times as you feel like you need to and with as many family members as you feel your heart is at war with.
This week, work on seeing people with a "heart at peace."
Build a word study on "heart at peace" or "heart at war." You won't find these in a dictionary, so look for a definition as you read "The Anatomy of Peace" and then add scriptures that back it up and quotes from wise people. Don't forget to write the application. Why do you want/not want that kind of heart? How does it affect your leadership skills to have that type of heart?
Apply:
We often carry around hurt or pain from our past. We may think that these things don't bother us anymore. But unless we have made peace with them -- have expressed the feelings, got them all out, forgave and moved on -- we carry them around with us. The old negative feelings continue to hold us back and taint the relationships that we build in the future. These feeling continually keep us with a "heart at war" towards others.
Think of the people in your immediate family - parents and sibling (mentors, you can include your children in this). Which family member do you have a "heart at war" with? (Having a "heart at war" with someone doesn't mean that you hate them. It looks more like someone who bugs you or who you are easily drawn into contention with. We all have these feelings, so don't feel bad, we can fix it!) Choose the person you feel your heart is most at war with and write, beginning your writing with "My heart is at war with _(name)__ because...". Don't worry if you don't know what you are going to write. Once you start a paper with that sentence, it will come to you. Write everything that comes to your mind, don't edit things out (even if it's yucky). Get it all out. End your writings with "please forgive me for feeling this way and holding onto these negative feelings."
Now that you have written this paper, it is very important that you do the following: DO NOT SHOW IT TO ANYONE, DO NOT SHOW IT TO THE PERSON YOU WROTE ABOUT, and DO NOT KEEP IT AND REREAD IT. Take your paper and either shred it into little pieces and throw it away or even better, take it outside to your BBQ grill and burn it. (Please get your parent's permission before using fire, and DON'T BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!)
This pulls the negative feelings out of your heart and mind and is the beginning of healing your heart and your relationship with this family member. Do this as many times as you feel like you need to and with as many family members as you feel your heart is at war with.
This week, work on seeing people with a "heart at peace."
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